Skittles
by TheJetsetter
Summary: " LOVE ME, AMY! SAY WHAT YOU WANT ABOU-" "SHUT UP, YOU TWIT! I WASNT DONE TALKING!" Oh, the horrible things that happen when you eat too many Skittles."
1. Chapter 1

Dan and Jonah had been gone for a few hours now.

Amy, Dan, Natalie, Ian, and Sinead had been sitting in the lounge area of the Madrigal base. It was directly in between both the boys and girls dorm. There were a few couches and armchairs, a table and fridge, and a enormous plasma screen TV. The group was watching "Confessions of a True Shopaholic" which all of them had gotten bored of. All except Natalie. She had cried during parts and kept nodding agreeably during the whole movie.  
>20 minutes after the movie started, Jonah and Dan had gone off in search of snacks and Sinead had gone off to do some educational stuff. Now it was only Ian, Amy, and Natalie.<p>

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><p>Natalie was now watching "From Prada to Nada" Amy was reading, and Ian was IMing with his friend, Teddy Hastings. Then Jonah and Dan walked in, each carrying two Wal Mart bags.<p>

"Oh no." Amy groaned.

The bags were filled with bags of skittles. Empty. Bags of Skittles. Ian and Natalie looked wary. They had heard about the time Dan ate 20 bags of Skittles. Each Wal Mart bag was home to 30 bags of Skittles.

Dan strutted over to Natalies couch , draped his arm around her, and shouted in her ear:

"Nat! Amy and Ian are gonna name their baby Dan! Isnt that so nice? "He slurred. "Skittles are nice. Babies are nice. And the world goes round and ro-" He hiccuped.

Amy's face went red and Ian's went pale. Jonah walked over and sat on Amy's lap, much to Ian's dismay.

"She is quite the catch, Ivan! Amy's eyes are as green as...as.."He paused. As..grass! " He bellowed triumphantly.

Natalie smirked. "Arent you going to stop him Ian?" she asked.

"IM NOT AFRAID! TO TAKE A STAND! EVERYBODY! COME TAKE MY HAND!" Jonah sang.

Natalie raised her eyebrow. "Ian'll knock your sugar high bum to the ground."she declared.

"SOMETIMES LOVE COMES AROUND! AND IT KNOCKS YOU DOWN !JUST GET BACK UP AND IT KNOCKS YOU DOWN!"

"Are you just going to answer with a song Jonah?" Amy asked.

"SING IT FOR THE WORLD! SING IT TIL YOUR NUTS! SING IT OUT FOR THE ONES THATLL HATE YOUR GUTS!"

Ian rose, massaging his temples." Amy, how do you-"

"LOVE ME! AMY! SAY WHAT YOU WANT ABO-"

"I WASNT DONE TALKING, YOU TWIT!"

"THATS NOT MY NAME! THATS NOT MY NAME! THATS NOT MY NAME, THATS NOT MY NICKNAME!"

Sinead chose that time to walk into the room. "Help us." Ian mouthed.

'HELP! I NEED SOMEBODY! HELP! NOT JUST ANYBODY!"

Sinead walked backwards out of the room slowly. Ian turned to Amy, who was trying to drag Dan off Natalie. "BUT I AM A NINJA NAT!

"Okay! Okay! Youre a ninja now get off of me! She shrieked.

"Amy, what did you do the last time he went mad like this?" Ian asked.

"AND BOTH OF US ARE MAD FOR-"

"SHUT UP!" Ian shouted.

"SOMEDAY ILL BE, LIVIN IN A BIG OLD CITY! AND ALL YOU'LL EVER GONNA BE IS MEAN!"

"I called a friend?"Amy offered.

"That's it!" Ian declared. He pulled out his phone.

"867-4309!"

"Hamilton! Get to the lounge. PLEASE HURRY!"

A few moments later, Hamilton burst into the room. It mustve been quite the scene, Amy and Ian dragging Dan off Natalie, and Jonah singing and dancing on the , Hamilton took Dan off and locked him in a broom closet. Hamilton turned to Jonah.

Jonah paused. He raised his arms. "Can I just go to my room?" Hamilton complied. He nodded at Amy and Ian and walked out. The two collapsed next to a frazzled-looking Natalie, who was clutching the couch for dear life.

Ian was first to break the silence:

"By God! What do they put in those ridiculous American candies?"


	2. Funnels and Funny Girls

Well, here it is! After a few requests, I wrote a part 2! I doubt anyone will review it, and that makes me sad. I had fun writing it though...soooo, here it is! Read Away!

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><p>"Oh my god! Ian! What do we do?" That was Amy, overreacting, but really, who wouldn't in this situation?<p>

It turns out that one of the Wal-Mart bags Jonah was carrying was still Skittles filled. Dan discovered that, and taking the bag, he walked to the kitchen to do who knows what.

Amy, Ian, and Natalie were arguing what movie to watch. Amy and Ian did not want to watch another boring fashion documentary. They continued for a while, until Dan walked in with Jonah behind him.

Their hands were behind their backs and they had the Ian Kabra Smirk on their faces. Before the trio could react, Hamilton trotted in and picked Amy and Natalie up. He deposited them in Dan's closet.

"Sorry guys, they paid me to do this!" He chuckled.

By this point now, Ian was cornered by Jonah and Dan. He was trying to get them off of him, but really? What is a British schoolboy against two sugar-high maniacs? Dan pulled his hands from behind his back to reveal...a blender and a funnel?

Ian's amber eye's widened. "Please tell me that's not..."

"Liquified Skittles! Brilliant! I'm just like freaking Einstein..." Dan slurred.

"Get lost you two! You can't be serious! This isnt funny!" Ian spat.

""AND HE SAYS HONEY! YOURE A FUNNY GIRL!" Jonah sang.

"Jonah shut up! Now get away from me!"

Sadly, Jonah and Dan didn't want no for an answer. Jonah nodded to Hamilton. Hamilton held Ian down and Dan forced the funnel down Ian's throat. Giggling like an annoying little girl, Jonah deposited the Skittle Concoction.

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><p>Amy and Natalie finally broke down the door to the closet. Amy surveyed the scene. Ian was thrashing and choking. Jonah was giggling, and Dan had a rather bad case of the hiccups.<p>

"Oh my god! Ian! What do we do? Amy shrieked.

"Get him to the Lucian Floor. I'll hold them off". Natalie picked up her dart gun and ran at the crazy sugar high maniacs.

Amy dragged Ian off the floor and was more or less supporting him completely. She took the elevator over stairs, and took him to Floor 3 of the Madrigal building, for Lucians.

Ian was breathing heavily, and after a glass of water, retained conciousness. He looked painfully awake, and after a glance at Amy, promptly burst into tears.

What. The. Hell? What to do ? Ian was crying! Amy tried for a pat on the back, but Ian grabbed her hand and pulled Amy into a bear hug. She swore she heard a rib crack.

"I'm so sorry for Korea, Amy! And on the boat! And China! I've been so mean after you saved my *hic* life! " He sobbed. "I *hic* didn't want to do it but *hic* Isaaabbeelll!" "She's sooo mmeaaann! I wouldn't have done it! I *hic* love you!

Oh dear God. She wanted to hear this but really? Ian was so sugar high it had made him delusional!

Amy tried to just get Ian another glass of water (and some sort of sleeping pill) but he was holding on too tight!

"O-kay I-I-an! I *choke* forgive you! Please l-let go now! She gasped.

Suddenly let go. Amy got up off the floor, and Ian promptly fell off the couch, unconcious.

Natalie stood a few feet away, brandishing her dart gun. Her hair was a wreck and her couture dress was torn. She sat on the couch, propped her feet on her brother and said:

"Now, shall we watch The Devil Wears Prada next?"


	3. Hangover

Ha! The very last part of this story! Don't worry, I'll write more humor! It was totally fun to write!

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><p>Amy and Natalie ended up sleeping on the couch in shifts. The darts Natalie had used were only strong enough to disable for a few hour. They would be enough to make Dan, Jonah, and Ian go back to normal.<p>

Ian was still on the floor. Amy checked to make sure he wasn't comatose.

Finally, at 6 in the morning, Dan walked in. Amy woke Natalie up, much to her dismay.

"Amy, what happened? I can't remember anything from last night and my tummy hurts!" He said woozily.

Natalie threw a Tums at him. "You went on a Skittles sugar-high rampage with Jonah and attacked me, embarrassed Amy, got locked in a closet! Then came back and paid Hamilton to throw us in a closet, liquified Skittles and had Hamilton hold Ian down while you and Jonah force-fed it to him in a funnel! I had to shoot you all with darts while Amy rescued Ian and then he got sugar high and all weepy! AND YOU RIPPED MY DRESS! DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?"

"I did all that stuff! AWESOOOMMEE!" Amy kept Natalie from trying to choke Dan.

Then at 7 Jonah walked in.

"Jonah!" Dan declared.

" ME MYSELF AND I! ITS ALL ABOUT -"

Natalie promptly shot Jonah with a dart. Amy shook her head and sat on the couch while Dan and Natalie argued. Eventually Ian woke up and picked himself off the floor, hitting his head on the coffee table. Amy got an ice pack and brought it to him.

"Amy? Wh-what happened? I blacked out and I can't remember anything."

"Dan and Jonah fed you liquified Skittles through a funnel, so Natalie and I dragged you upstairs away from them, and you got all weepy and apologized to me, saying that you loved me, when Natalie shot you with a dart." She said this all in one breath.

Ian stared, wide eyed, and rubbed the back of his neck. "Well, I would have said that later on, with a little more dignity but..."

"Hey Ian! Want some Skittles?" Dan called, sitting on Natalie.

"No, I don't want any of those stupid candies!" He shouted.

"It's a British candy company!" He said temptingly.

"I dont ever want to hear that name again! I WILL SUE SKITTLES! AND THE PACKAGERS! AND, AND EVERYTHING ASSOCIATED WITH IT!'

"LETS DO IT TONIGHT! GIVE ME EVERYTHING TONIGHT!"

Natalie shot a dart at Jonah.


End file.
